It is Friday...........

Here we are again at the end of another week, we are now in June - 6 months in - in 6 months time we will all be getting ready for Christmas and doing the last minute things that the last weekend before Christmas asks for. Some of us will shop, some of us will go to concerts, and some of us will go to Cristingle services at church.

But what about now - it is mid June, tomorrow is the 21st or Summer Solstice. It is mid-summer day. Throughout history this is seen as a special day. Shakespear wrote a play about it, Philip Pullman uses Midsummer Day as a vital date in the last of the Dark Materials Books.

Celts would say that Midsummer is the day of the Fire Festival and ancient stone circles are aligned by the sun on this day. Indeed the Heel Stone at Stonehenge is aligned to let the sun on Midsummer Day rise over it. In some the Solstice is actually the 24th but when Pope Gregory realigned everything the 21st it became.............

So what does the middle of the year mean to us??

I have been told it is very bad to dwell on things past and the thoughts that are associated with this. If a person has 50000 thoughts a day, then it is logical some are about previous occurences. Sense would say reminise for a few seconds and then discard the thought.

Let's say that the thought is over an argument from 6 months ago. We will relive the event in our head, if we dwell on it we will go through all the things we could have said, and all the regrets we have. And from here we will get depressed over the occurence.

Now what if we just dismissed the though? Be honest can we travel back in time and stop the argument ever happening? No, it happened and that can't be changed. So why think about what we could have said 6 months after the event? I say LET IT GO!!!

Be honest, it could be a great thing like a delicious mince pie. Can we go back and re-eat the pie? No!!

So what is the antidote to all of this???

Take the mince pie, it was lovely, what to do - we can spend lots of time thinking about the pie or we can reminise over it's taste, we can spend another few seconds smiling as we remember how the pastry crumbled. And Then -

LET IT GO......

In another few months we can buy (or make) a new mince pie and that will be as special. Spend a few seconds comparing and then just enjoy the pie in the hand. If it is not as good, well, buy / make another batch and see how that is.

I appreciate all you people saying what has this to do with Midsummer???

Nothing, Nothing at all except the timing..............

Here is a small secret, my hidden story if you like -

I am guilty of dwelling on the past. I should be locked away for trying to blame everything on occurences that often happened 4 years ago, or longer. What if this, what if that.......

The fact is (however sad) the main occurence happened so the what if means I am trying to delve into a situation of change I CANNOT make happen.

Let's say that December 2004 my Grandmother didn't die or in the November of the same year my Father didn't. What difference would I experience now? Both would have "advised" me over the period. Sometimes I would resent this, sometimes I would be grateful for it. My memories should allow me to visualise their attendance to my issues now, today, and not think what if, more of an understanding of their opinion.

Now I cannot turn back the clock. They both died and until I pass on I don't know if there is another life to follow and if I will see them there. Can I change the outcome of my future death? No, at some point I will die too and then I will know. My own children will have to deal with their mourning. But although I don't want them to experience this I CANNOT CHANGE IT.

I have had issues, I still have issues. My story has been dogged by my inability to accept things and move on. My inability not to dwell on everything. I can't live today, look what happened XX months ago. Look what happened XX years ago. I spent so much time worrying and blaming events I couldn't move forwards or let them go.

Events that happen should be just that, EVENTS THAT HAPPEN. but they have happened and cannot be changed. Learn from them - good or bad - and then face the next (inevitable) event without the previous or old one interfering. Relate to the past but do not blame it.

The mince pie was lovely, and so is this one. It evokes memories of the other pie but this is the real thing now.

That is my story, and my learning. It has taken a long time, actually until 3-25pm on the 20th June 2008 to fully realise why things have always been an issue and problem. But I think that I may just have been able to voice what I now know. So let me see if it can be put into practice.

So how is that linked to Midsummer?? The link is simple. It has taken until Midsummer 2008 for me to realise the event. My initial thoughts and rambling were about rituals and festivals of Midsummer. Suddenly from here I have realised about memories. I don't know how I jumped from the Sun to memories. But, hey, I did and I think I actually understand about the future.

I will see how it goes, I also welcome any views about this!!!............

Couldn't let this pass............

I couldn't less this pass. I admit to being competive Dad, and more, a proud Dad!!

Ballinger Bombers FC have just been announced as the winners of the U10 fairplay league after only 2 years, and also, and unheard of, the U8's have also won their fairplay league after only 1 year!!! 2 winning teams in one club, what an achievement.

I know my son is in the U10's but for both teams to win WOW!!!!!!

Let me now explain my rant and see if I am wrong???

Ballinger was formed less than 2 years ago, by another certain father who had the guts to "put his money where his mouth is" and look what has been achieved.....

Let me go back in time -

2 years ago the father asked me if I felt the same as him, as our children, who were not in the clique and thus never got to play in matches, were getting upset every week. I had to say yes. I had to deal with a child who is a great Goalkeeper, but despite promises, was never picked to play in matches. He wanted to be a goalie and the incumbent team had to badger anyone to be in goal, but he was always left out.

As a number of other parents felt the same, especially after the formation of a "numpties" concilation team, wanted to move away from the village team and form a new one.

Today proves we were right!!!

I appreciate that in the real world the nice decent people get trodden on by those that don't care. But we do care!!

Our children are just that - children. I do not believe that currently any David Beckham is amongst them, there are some great players, but the expectation is lower. What is important is that EVERY child gets to play in their team, regardless of ability. Some of the players are very good. Some are not so good. But they all try and we congratulate them regardless. They have tried their hardest and that is all that actually counts.

When Ballinger was formed it was stated that our Mission was to allow ALL children to play as much as possible, irrespective of their ability. It was not looked at as a vehicle to score hundreds of goals and to win everything. It was not looked at an ego-boosting vessel for us the parents to say how great we must be, just look at our kids.

If the team finished bottom we didn't really care. If the team lost (or loses) every match we didn't care. All we cared about was that the children enjoy(ed) their sport.

We also stated that as parents we would do everything we could to support our teams and also the teams of our opponents. Nothing would be viewed by us as worse than being seen as opinionated and vocal in a negative way by ANYONE regardless of team.

I believe that our results of today prove that in this, and regardless of the future, we were right in our thinking and delivery.

Years ago (when I was only about 10) my Grandmother (RIP) stated

"You catch more flies with honey than vinegar"

I always believed this and despite everything still believe this. We all want to be millionaires, we all want to travel in our own helicopter. But I truly believe that it is actually more important to be true and just in as much as possible, and be respected for this, than to have the helicopter. This doesn't mean I don't want the millionaire lifestyle, it is more that I am realistic about the pitfalls of this.

If being rich means you have to tread on everyone in the process of getting to the top of the tree, I am not sure I want this for me or my children.

Everyone is only a step away from poverty or wealth regardless of where we are today. I have always been told the person you tread on today may well be treading on you in the future.

I may not be rich, I may not be at the top of the tree or in anyway succesful, BUT, I can hold my head up and say that at least it cannot be said "that James, what a Ba****D"

I can only hope that the Ballinger philosophy rubs off on my children.......

I would love to here views

Hello There, it is time to add a thought.......

I am sorry, I have to admit my additions to this Blog have been a little hit and miss of late. I don't know why, I know it is not "I can't be bothered" and I know I have had lots of ideas. I just haven't got them down!!! All I can do is apologise, and like my school reports always said, "must try harder!!!!"

Right now I have a large grin on my face - Today my 10 year olds football team won the fair play league after only 2 years of being formed. To add to this achievement the Under 8 team we have also won their league after only 1 year. I am a very proud father!!!

And so the thought of the day...........

I was listening to the radio recently and there was a news article during which the "spokesman" for the government stated that earnings were significantly up. The old were getting better pensions and poverty line people were getting more help. Then it was stated that the Old were some 31% better off and the average household were 16% better off. I don't know from when but we are all so much better off!!!

The spokesman then stated that they couldn't understand why, even after these rises, more people at all levels were struggling, on the bread line, below the bread line falling into negative equity etc.

Now call me stupid, but surely it does not take an economist to see that if incomes have risen and yet poverty has also gone up more, then the cost of living is higher than the 31% rise in pensions or 16% in family income or else the poverty would not be rising.

It also would not take a rocket scientist to see that fuel prices are rising out of control, energy costs are rising out of control, food costs are out of control and so are lots of other everyday prices. However, pensions, wages and benefits are very much not out of control.

So why the huge surprise and how is this helping the “man on the street”??

I do not see how the average person is being helped. The gap between the poor and obscenely rich is growing wider by the minute and, despite this sounding like jealousy, the poor are getting poorer.

The wages available are getting less, the jobs are getting less and the employer knows and states that if the "employee doesn't like it he can leave" for everyone who cannot afford to work, there will be someone who will. People who considered themselves as not flush but "above water" are now struggling and often cannot afford to actually go to work as the petrol price is too high.

Add this to a large number of offshore companies queing up to step in how is the UK person supposed to survive??

I was speaking to an Australian lady today and had to agree that something here is wrong. Even she said that if her brother came here from Australia looking for work, he would turn arounbd and go home as the UK is in such a mess.

I would love to here any views about this strange situation...........