If we had an Hour left.........

I was reading an article last night on the Kristine and Richard Carlson's website. On the 13th December 2006 Richard very unexpectedly and suddenly passed away. In the words of a well known rock sock "only the good die young, the evil seem to live forever"how true does this seem.

In his life Richard and Kris inspired many people and their books in the"Don't Sweat" series have been an huge help to many, including myself and a great friend, who I started school with, who introduced me to them.

One of the things he asked was what would we do and who would we call, write to or speak to if we only had an hour left to live.

And this started me thinking, and looking on the net at related articles. I came across a great poem written and left where the twin towers fell that asked if the people who perished had known would they have done things differently or with more passion.

I am away from home as I write, I have been away all week (today is Thursday) and I won't get home to my family until tomorrow evening. Although I phone home lots, and talk to my wife and children it is not the same as being there. I may shout and get angry when I am at home but this is just frustration over events. I still class my family as most important and "going home" the closest thing we all have to roots.

Now I know that a few weeks ago my eldest son (10) asked if I was going as I was in a suit, I said yes - see you later. He again asked if I was going and I again reiterated I had a meeting and would be home soon. He asked if I was really coming home. I was touched and said of course. He showed saddness, apparently if I could have moved out then he could have a dog!!! So much for being touched, I can be replaced!!!!

What this actually made me realise is how much I need to return home to be with my wife and children. I may be away a lot, my office may be 200 miles from home, but I stilll view my family as very important. I go and see all 3 boys asleep at night and tuck them in. I kiss them goodnight and talk to them - they can't answer back Hurrah - sometimes I just stand a watch them asleep. I always say goodnight to my wife and somewhere along the lines, when at home, I touch her hand with mine, or foot with mine. I guess I just check she is there.

Last night I asked what would I do if I had an hour left, I think I would do the following........

An hour, it is not long enough to make a fruit cake or rock cakes so I had better forget these actions.

I would write to all my friends and thank them for all they have done over the past. Their support and help. Their understanding and their patience. I guess I would ask for them to look after my family for me and to remember me with a smile and not a tear.

I would then gather all of my family together. An hour is not long enough for a heartfelt outpouring of emotion. All I could do is hug them tight and tell them how much I love them. I would tell my boys all I could and ask them not to forget their worn out Dad. Maybe if my 10 year old gets a dog, name it after me!!

I would hold my wife and tell her all I haven't over the years (20 of them!!) and ask for her forgiveness for all of the stupid moves I have made over the years that she has supported regardless of what she really felt. Most of all, and last night I really realised this, I would cuddle her tight. Feel her whole body against mine and tell her how much I love her and how much she means to me and has meant to me. I guess I have never really done this.

It is a stretched out hour this, for I would also put in writing anything I could to my Children to help them on the way and I would put in writing any feelings I could to my Wife so she could have a lasting memory of me.

And finally, I would try and put down a short "mission statement" for the world to see that hopefully makes people think a little, remember a little, and try to give something back a little.

What would you do??